Pretty Little PSYCHO!
by Shadow JAFF
Summary: After the Sasuke retrieval mission, the squad takes a psychology test, and Naruto fails. Medical tests also show Naruto is actually a woman. At the same time Naruto is told her mental state, and she just SNAPS. Like. A. Little. Twig. Crazy Fem-Naruto, Tayuya x Squad 7, three way, four way, yuri, insanity, demons running wild. I own nothing.
1. How to Make a Psycho

**Pretty Little PSYCHO!**

 **Naruto fanfic**

 **After the Sasuke retrieval mission, the squad takes a psychology test, and Naruto fails. Medical tests also show Naruto is actually a woman. At the same time Naruto is told her mental state, resulting from Sasuke's betrayal and her being mortally wounded multiple times, meaning her ninja licence needs to be temporarily revoked, she learns she is a she, and has her first period. Add her already unstable mind from her harsh childhood, and she just SNAPS. Like. A. Little. Twig. Insane Fem-Naruto, Tayuya x Squad 7 (minus Kakashi), rated 'M' for language, mental instability, Murder, sexual themes, Harley Quinn-like behavior, and Orochimaru. Three way, four way, yuri, insanity, demons running wild. I own nothing.**

 _ **Pretty little pretty little pretty little psycho**_

 _ **Pretty little pretty little**_ **pretty little PSYCHO!**

 **Chapter 1: How to Make a Psychopath.**

Tsunade stood over the blond child lying before her. Naruto was the last to return from the SRM, and was in the worst condition, having been impaled in the chest twice, covered in second degree burns, and missing half a hand. Fortunately, the demon had fully healed the physical damage by the time she made it to the Naruto's room for the physical, as Naruto's first full medical checkup EVER could tell the sage.

'But to think Naruto was a girl this whole time,' Tsunade thought to herself. Tsunade stood off to the side as Inochi Yamanaka preformed a mental checkup on the sleeping girl. Inochi's eyes opened, and the look he gave the Godame Hokage was not a good one. The two left the room as a nurse came in to give the girl some nutrition injections.

"Okay, Inochi, what's wrong?" Tsunade asked. The Yamanaka clan leader looked back into the room as he started.

"Naruto has been in a minor state of mental instability for several years now, long before joining the academy. With her childhood I'm genuinely not surprised. The kyuubi, while trapped, probably forever, did nothing to help, in fact its constant healing her only made things worse for the poor girl. Sasuke's betrayal, and the degree of the injuries he gave her, made her even more unstable. She never should have become a ninja, and needs to stop going on missions now, at the very least, if not seal away her chakra entirely. Even if she gets treatment and returns to normal sanity levels, she may never be fit for field work."

Just then, Sakura walked over. "Oh, hello, Lady Tsunade, Yamanaka-San," she says, giving each a quick bow. Tsunade smiles. "Hello, Sakura. Here to visit Naruto and Sasuke?"

(AN: Naruto lost to Sasuke but he fainted from chakra exhaustion.)

She nods. "Yes, Lady Tsunade. It's been a long time, and I need to get re-acquaintanced," she says, confusing Tsunade a little. With that, she enters the room just as the nurse exits. Tsunade and Inochi head to the Hokage's office to continue their conversation.

Sakura closes the door behind her and heads to the beds her two teammates are on. They look peaceful, just lying there. She hears a noise from Sasuke's bed, and turns to see Sasuke awaken. Sasuke slowly sits up, but could not move his arms or legs as they were strapped down. Sakura sits down in the chair between Naruto and Sasuke's beds and turns to Sasuke. The raven haired boy looks over to Sakura and groans.

"Damnit! Why am I back here?" he growls. Sakura reaches over and slaps him.

"Quiet, fool. I'm not that stupid fangirl who dares use my name. I'm the genuine article. You lost consciousness after fighting, and traumatizing, Naruto. Ino-pig's father just did a mental test on Naruto, and Tsunade a physical. Naruto's a girl, and her mental state is close to shattering. They're considering revoking her ninja licence.

"I have an idea, because even if they don't lock you up for betraying Konoha, they'll likely try to make you spend your days as breeding stock. Actually, they may even just pin you down on top of Naruto, who would be labeled insane and tied down for everyone's 'protection', and make you two bred for the rest of your lives. I know about how Uzumaki women work with reproduction. They have zero chance of miscarriage, in some rare cases they have no labor pain and no birth fat, and they are prone to multiple births; single children like Naruto are extremely rare.

"My plan is: we convince the council that you can be trusted not to leave again, and to control Naruto, and then during our next out-of-the-village mission, the three of us leave. Naruto's crazy and will likely listen to you, and I can just let the fangirl take control again. The trigger to turn me back into me is 'Shatter Me'.

"Once we get out of the village, turn me back into me and we'll go." Sasuke looks at the pink haired girl in bewilderment. He shakes it off and askes a crucial question.

"How do we know it will work?"

The two are slightly thrown off by a slightly crazy giggle coming from the other bed. They turn that was to see Naruto giggling, and wide awake, with her covers thrown off and a hand down the front of her damaged pants.

"N-Naru-Chan! What are you doing? And how long have you-" Naruto cuts Sakura off with another giggle.

"The whole time, Sake-Chan! Ever since you came in, really. Also, is bleeding down here a common thing for girls?" As she says this she pulls her hand out and her index and middle fingers are covered in blood up to the third knuckle (the whole finger, basically).

Sakura blushed a little, both at seeing the blood and from Naruto remembering her old pet name for her, before the bitch fangirl personality took over. "Naru-Chan, is this the first time you've bled from there?" Naruto giggles and nods. "YEP!" she says, popping the 'P'. Sakura sighs.

"Yes, it happens once a month to all women after they hit puberty. Although for you I think it might be a bit different because of how the Uzumaki reproductive organs work. Even after your period you can get pregnant because you can have multiple eggs on standby at any given time, I'd say the eggs last about three months before your period happens and new eggs are added each month, so you always have 2-6 eggs waiting to be fertilized, even after your period. And even if you're already pregnant, more eggs are added, so it is possible for you to get pregnant again even before the first batch comes out of the oven."

Naruto and Sasuke look at Sakura, Naruto with confusion and Sasuke with surprise. "Damn," Sasuke notes, "If the council knew that, they'd force Naruto to become the local breeding factory. And I have a feeling they would make me your most common baby daddy," he said, pointing that last part at his best friend/rival/teammate/sister figure.

Naruto gets a faraway look in her eyes. She then looks at her arms and legs, then Sasuke's, then her own again. Sakura sweat drops. Naruto, the supposedly insane one, had no bindings, while Sasuke was tied down.

"Naru-Chan, I need you to at least pretend to be reasonable for my plan to go off. Just listen to Sasuke, okay. I need to go now."

Naruto nods, and then turns to Sasuke. "Hey, I know! I can use genjutsu and we can amp it with Sasukun's Sharingan to trick the council into giving us what we want!" She then starts giggling like crazy again. Sasuke nods.

"Yes… yes that's a great idea! Naruto, make it so that everyone except Sakura who comes in here falls under my suggestion when they see my sharengan!" Naruto laughs manically and sits bolt upright, clapping her hands together and releasing her chakra. Sakura and Sasuke feel a little off center as waves of dark mystic power washes over them.

Sasuke activates his Sharingan as he hears a nurse coming. The door slams open as Shizune comes in. "What the hell's going on in here!? I'll report you to the Hokage… if you… don't…" Shizune trails off as the powers of the genjutsu and the Sharingan alter her thoughts.

"Untie me." Sasuke says simply. Shizune walks over to the last Uchiha and unties the ropes binding his arms and legs to the bed. "Now leave. If anyone asks, Naruto freaked out about her first period, but Sakura calmed her down." Shizune nods, answers "Yes, Sir," and leaves, closing the door behind her.

Naruto giggles again. "Best, plan, ever!" Sakura and Sasuke just sweat drop. Sakura then leaves, getting ready for when the bitch fangirl takes over.

 **Asdfghjkl qwertyuiop zxcvbnm**

Later that same afternoon, Sasuke and Naruto are allowed out of the hospital, although they are escorted to the council chambers by several armed Anbu and even a few R.O.O.T. solders. At first they tried keeping Naruto and Sasuke apart but the blond kept ending up latched to the raven-haired boy's arm, even when she was tied up in chakra-absorption chains and being carried by two shinobi while strapped to a stretcher and wearing a strait jacket... 'What the actual fuck?' Kakashi, who had brought all the binding gear from Anbu HQ, thought when he saw Naruto, apparently female, had escaped the bindings and was hugging Sasuke's arm into her breast.

Naruto just giggled, not improving any of the shinobi's moods.

The group arrived at the council chamber with no difficulty. All the seats were filled, and Sasuke and Naruto saw Sakura, still not a fangirl, from the looks of it, standing next to Shizune, who still had a faraway look in her eyes. Naruto let go of Sasuke and the two stood strait before the council.

'I hope it works,' Sasuke thought, while Naruto's train of thought was pretty much 'Derp, derp, derp, derp!'

No one noticed or cared about the small wisps of energy flowing out of Naruto, those who did notice just thought it was Naruto's crappy chakra control, amped by madness. No one knew that buried deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, **deep, deep, deep, deep, DEEP** within the madness, Naruto was weaving a genjutsu so monstrously powerful, only the infinite Tsukuyomi could compete, just on the sheer fact of being supposedly 'infinite', while Naruto's will last for Kami knows how long, even without Naruto keeping it charged.

No one saw it coming. No one saw the strings Naruto attached to everyone, or how she attached the ends of the strings to Sasuke's Sharingan.

"Sasuke Uchiha, while law states that you must be imprisoned for your crime of treason, the council has voted that while you will still be punished, it will be much less severe," Tsunade spoke, with a disapproving tone.

"As for you, Naruto, law states that, until such a time as your mental state is properly restored, you would be locked away in a mental institute, possibly in solitary confinement, the council has voted that so long as you do not do anything to endanger the village, you will be kept in the care of Sasuke Uchiha, provided you can help keep him from leaving the village," she says, in a much more caring and motherly tone.

The idiots on the civilian council were very pleased with these results; even if the Demon Child was being told not let the Prodigy Uchiha fuck up again, although they were okay with the Prodigy Uchiha being told to not let the Demon Child fuck up. Sakura smirked. The plan was going fantastically, and Naruto's genjutsu wasn't even active yet. In fact, from what she could feel, the slow process was halted when Tsunade spoke about Sasuke watching Naruto and vice versa.

Danzo also smirked. He had his own agenda, and it involved making the Uchiha join him, marry and plow the demon, then sending him to capture other Kekkei Genkai users and make _them_ breed with the demon, with the Uchiha in charge of his new wife's super powered harem, and army of super powered children, with the odd dash of mind control and hypnosis. He knew about Uzumaki women and had been looking to find one, as the only other one he knew was currently dead with no known DNA left behind to clone. It was a commonly known fact to those who knew anything about Uzumaki reproduction that a mother was capable of taking care of hundreds of children at once, if they had to, and that Uzumaki were capable of reproducing with their own cousins and siblings because their DNA is supposed to mutate, making birth defects either impossible or perfectly useful. That's actually what led to several known Kekkei Genkai.

Naruto smiled and Sasuke smirked at this information. They, along with Sakura, were then dismissed, and the three all went to Sasuke's apartment to plan their next move.

 **Asdfghjkl qwertyuiop zxcvbnm**

As soon as they got to the apartment and Sasuke locked the door, Naruto immediately stripped before heading to the bathroom and hopping into the shower, which she set to full heat. She liked hot water, it calmed her nerves and turned her on, plus warm water had a natural effect on old wounds and internal stress, and as Naruto's body would technically be covered in scars, the hot water was REALY soothing on her light tanned skin, loosening all her joints and muscles.

Naruto had left the bathroom door wide open so anyone who walked past could see Naruto buck naked in the shower, as she also left the curtain open. Sasuke knew the water was really hot because he could see the steam flowing out of the bathroom and fogging up a good portion of the apartment. As Sasuke led Sakura to the living room he tried to avoid looking at Naruto. He had seen Naruto naked before, at bathhouses and hot springs, but Naruto always covered up her lower half, probably never bothered with her top because she was flatter than a glass window. And didn't know she was a girl.

He couldn't resist looking now, though, and what he did see for that one second was quite good.

Naruto now had a more womanly frame, and had gone up to a low 'B' cup, from the looks of it. She looked like a slightly smaller version of her _Sexy no Jutsu_ form. She currently was only washing, just standing under the water with her arms and forehead on the wall. It turned him on. He didn't get to enjoy the view, as he walked past and sat down on the couch, and Sakura sat down on the recliner opposite.

Naruto started humming a tune while showering.

 **Asdfghjkl qwertyuiop zxcvbnm**

 **That's all for chapter one. Yep, I'm fucking around with psychology. We all know Sakura was at least mildly MPD, and/or bipolar. Sasuke has an inferiority complex (or is it a superiority complex?), and after seeing your family get murdered by the ONE guy you trust (multiple times), you tend to be a little crazy. Also, how is Naruto NOT crazy? Even if canon Naruto wasn't beaten or raped or tortured or experimented on or whatever the fuck all of us fanfiction writers are doing to fuck up his/her life, he should be at least a little on the crazy side.**

 **Now, I do not mean to upset or insult anyone in the audience who is… a little loose - hell, I'm a little loose myself – but this is fanfiction and I do not know all that much about psychosis, so it doesn't even really matter. No one is perfect, and that's a damn good thing.**

 **Also, Naruto and Sasuke will be doing a lot of banging in the future, both with each other, and with other characters, canon and OC.**

 **As for all that info on Uzumaki reproduction, I came up with it all on my own. Because why not, I mean the story is named after a song named after the male genitalia. Why not make Naruto, and by extension, Karin, into super baby factories, like weird rabbit people or something?**

 **It's my fanfiction and I can let my craziness and/or fetishes run wild! (Note, pregno is not one of my fetishes.)**


	2. Im Insane

**Pretty Little PSYCHO!**

 **Naruto fanfic**

 **I own nothing.**

 **Chapter 3: I'm Insane**

Sakura returned to Sasuke's apartment with a couple of Naruto's bags filled with some things she thought Naruto would see as important: her clothes, her rather large collection of scrolls, her weapons, her sheets, clock, house décor, some potted plants, and a strange fox plushy that she could have sworn was looking at her. The plush doll seemed to possess the same dark aura that Naruto had used in the hospital room, during the Chunin Exams, and at the bridge to Nami.

Weird.

She was actually surprised at what she saw upon entering the apartment.

The room was literally upside down, with books flying around like birds and all the lights glowing black, shedding the room in negative light. Naruto was sitting on the couch on the ceiling, playing what sounded like a fighting game. She had a black rod-thing in her mouth, and aside from her dark blue boxers and unzipped jacket, was naked.

Sasuke was hanging upside down from the wall, wearing black shorts and a light orange high collared shirt, pinned to the wall by several kunai knifes stuck in the loose edges of his clothing, as well as one _very close_ to his junk. He had a black ball in his mouth and a sign hanging from his neck as though he was right-side up. She couldn't read it but it looked familiar somehow.

'… This is genjutsu,' she deducted. She weaved the necessary hand seal and broke the illusion.

The room was back to how it was before. No flying books, no negative light. Naruto's boxers and jacket were orange one again, and the rod held between her teeth turned out to be a pregnancy test, business end out. She looked closer at it and sighed with relief.

Negative. Whatever had happened, Naruto was safe.

Sakura then went over to Sasuke, whose clothes were back to their normal blue and white. The ball turned out to be the boy's own underwear, and she recognized the language on the sign to be Yokaic, the language of demons, which was taught to her by Naruto when they were very young, although she only knew about a dozen letters.

'Im-r—natin- -a-tar-'

With some time and difficulty, Sakura was able to decipher the message.

'Impregnating bastard'.

She looks at Sasuke. "You didn't tell her the blue line means no baby, did you?" she asks. The boy looks hardly at her. "I never even saw the test after Naruto took it, I thought she read the instructions, and… Wait, it's negative?" Sasuke asks with a hint of relief.

Sakura nods. "What the hell happened after I left?" Sasuke sighed. "Half an hour after you left I went into the bathroom to see what was taking Naruto so long, one thing lead to another, and the condom broke."

" _ **ULTRA COMBOOOOOO!"**_

Sasuke and Sakura looked over and saw Naruto was tossing aside the controller; clearly she was done with the game. She got up and went to the kitchen before she saw Sasuke was no longer hanging. Before anyone knew it Sasuke was imbedded into the nearest wall as the head of a hammer hovered where the raven-haired boy once stood. Naruto then put away the hammer (somehow) and started laughing maniacally. Sakura reached into one of the bags she had and pulled out a sack of what she knew was Naruto's third favourite food.

Chocolate orbs.

Sakura walked over to the window and tossed several of the chocolate balls out into the street. She stepped aside as an orange blur shot out the window.

She then pulled Sasuke out of the wall.

"So, you and Naruto-" Sasuke cut her off there. "Yes. I think she was using an aphrodisiac," he muttered.

Naruto then walked back through the window and collapsed on the couch. Sakura turned to the blond girl and shook her head before she headed out back home. Sasuke walked over and sat on the couch.

"The blue line means no kids. The red cross is what you can react like that to," he stated. He did not expect the reaction he got.

Naruto looked at Sasuke with big tear-filled puppy eyes. She then pressed her face into the couch and fell asleep. 'Makes sense, it's ten at night.'

Sasuke reached into one of the bags Sakura had brought and pulled out a pillow and a blanket for Naruto, then carried the girl to his own room. A proper gentleman never makes a lady sleep on the couch.

Sasuke then thought of something as he put the blond woman down on his bed.

Inochi Yamanaka had said Naruto was mentally unstable, possibly insane.

So why was the worst she'd done some maniacal laughter and her major freak-out when she thought she was pregnant. And both of those were quite common in the elemental nations.

"Maybe…," he muttered to himself, "Maybe it's still bottled up. Maybe she's the kind that can switch from sensible to total nut on a whim, and that whim has yet to show. Or maybe something's keeping her in check. But what?"

He stood there for a good few minutes, thinking. He came to a conclusion.

"I need to go in her head, somehow, and see what's going on in there. Could Yamanaka have been lying?"

Sasuke put a hand over Naruto's eyes and brushed them open. She didn't react so she was still asleep. He looked into her eyes and started pumping chakra into his own. 'Luckily this power only needs eye contact, not active consciousness.'

" _ **SHARINGAN!"**_

Sasuke looked into Naruto's now tomoe filled eyes. "Show me the darkness," he said simply.

The room started to slowly fill with dark, mystical energy. Sasuke started seeing shapes in the darkness; people, buildings, monsters. He soon found himself in a pure white hallway. There were silver panels on the walls, with doors next to each one. Sasuke noticed the floor was covered knee deep with clear water, and wisps of dark energy flowed over the surface.

Sasuke started walking in the direction the water was flowing, and as he walked he saw a number of strange and bewildering things;

Books were flapping their pages, and scrolls seemed to ride an imaginary wind. People he recognized and people he did not walked past, on the floor, the walls, the ceiling, all in negative light. Animals of every color of the rainbow walked in and out of focus. The air was filled with a quiet, rhythmic sound, like singing, but in a language he'd never heard before.

He eventually found himself as a crossroad with three doors. The door in front of him was like a prison door, made up if metal bars, from which the water flowed, the room beyond filled with darkness.

The door to his right was wide open, but was glowing brightly. This door had a silver panel next to it.

The door to his left had a tag on it, with the same type of symbols that Naruto put on the sign she'd hung around his neck earlier. The door itself was orange.

Sasuke walked over to the open door, when something in the panel made him stop.

Earlier the panel was pure silver, but now it had a picture of him, years earlier, when Sasuke had defended Naruto from some bullies, before they became rivals. When Sasuke stepped back, the panel returned to silver. 'Weird,' Sasuke thought. He decided to ignore that door for now.

He then reached his hand between the bars for the barred door, and saw the room wasn't dark; it was in negative light! He heard a deep growl before pulling his arm back, as a massive set of jaws snapped where his hand had been. Sasuke jumped to the side to avoid being seen by the… whatever it was.

This action, however, knocked him into the third door, opening it, and he tumbled into the room. What he saw when he opened his eyes shocked him to no end.

Everything in the room was negative, save for the woman in the middle. The room had a queen sized bed, a number of doors, a cage, a vanity, a punching dummy, and a…

'What in the name of Kami is that?'

It looked like a table, but had straps and chains on it. Along the edges were numerous satchels and pockets, filled with things he could not see.

In the middle of the bed sat Lay Naruto, wearing a very loose purple-blue kimono with an orangey-brown obi. The kimono was very loose on her, exposing her shoulders and almost the entire topside of her breasts, as well as most of her right leg and her entire left leg. Her hair was longer, and tied into twin, high ponytails that reached down past her shoulders. Her right sleeve was bunched up and stopped at the crook of her elbow, while her left sleeve went down past her hand, only her fingers were in view.

The room felt warm and cool at the same time. Sasuke turned to get another look at the room and saw a shape in the vanity's mirror that shouldn't have been there. Sasuke sat down at the vanity and looked into the mirror. He saw Naruto and himself, it looked like they were cuddling. Then he saw they were underwater, and there was steam wafting from the pool in thick layers. There were bubbles in the water, but they weren't suds.

The water was boiling. And that was the least of it.

Sasuke saw images twisted and pulled in mad patterns, a world of complete and utter Chaos, filled with torture, murder, and all manner of pain. He saw hundreds of people, almost all from the Konoha village, suffering in every conceivable way. Ageing, starvation, addiction, intoxication, rage, loneliness, destruction, fire, ice, stone, some fast and some slow, things no one could imagine while still sane.

Sasuke turned away, fearing for his own sanity, and was met face to face with a smiling Naruto. But it wasn't a kind smile, or the fake smiles Naruto normally wore, or even the sultry one that Naruto had been wearing almost all afternoon.

It was one of pure insanity. Of Madness incarnate.

The door Sasuke had entered through slammed shut, and bars criss-crossed over it.

Sasuke was trapped.

Until a wisp of dark energy shot out of the cage in the wall opposite and he blacked out.

Sasuke woke up with a cold sweat. He was back in his own bed, and all the dark energy was gone. Naruto lay in the bed next to him, snuggling into his side, still wearing the jacket and boxers, but also wrapped in the blanket. Sasuke was still in his shorts and shirt.

Sasuke lay back down and thought about what he saw.

"… I need to protect her. Her mind is fragile, and I need to protect what's left. It is partially my fault this happened," he said to himself, before falling asleep.

He never noticed Naruto smile when she heard those words. She snuggled deeper into her man before letting sleep take over.

She'd punish Sasuke in the morning.

 **Chapter 3 end.**

 **Okay, this was a doozy to do, but I got it done! Sasuke now knows what's happening in Naruto's head.**

 **In this story, Sharingan can make people do what you want, regardless as to whether you are counties or not. In this case, it can even make people use ninja magic in their sleep.**

 **Next time, Sasuke will regret hypnotising Naruto… or will he? Also, lots of bashing.**

 **(Shadow JAFF fads into darkness)**


	3. Ive Got You Hypnotized

**Pretty Little PSYCHO!**

 **Naruto fanfic**

 **I own nothing.**

 **Chapter 4: I've got you hypnotized**

Sasuke woke up groggy. As he got up he noticed Naruto wasn't in the bed. He also could detect the scent of chocolate pancakes.

Sasuke changed into fresh clothes before walking into the kitchen, finding Naruto wearing an apron and black panties. Where did she get panties when all her underwear was boxers?

Sasuke just sat as Naruto placed a plate in front of him. He started to eat in silence as Naruto prepared a plate for herself. Sasuke tasted something in the pancakes that wasn't chocolate. He ignored it at first, but then noticed Naruto looking at him in a very creepy/weird way; he could only see her eyes, which were silted with no irises. Her lower face was blank, with a small, un-noticeable nose. (1)

Like a snake or a scorpion, waiting for its poison to take effect.

'… Wait a minute…'

Sasuke's eyes widened as a grin split Naruto's face in half.

'SHIT!' he mentally screamed as his body fell limp to the floor, and his cautiousness slipped into shadows.

He woke up roughly an hour later to find something utterly horrifying; a mirror showing him a girl, easily fifteen or sixteen, very well figured and very scantily clad, also tied up and hanging from the ceiling of his-currently-her room by her arms, with her feet just shy of the floor.

He then felt great pain as he fell to the floor and knocked his head against something hard and blunt. He was glad to see he was male again, and fully clothed. He was not happy, however, to see his 'rescuer'.

Sakura, the 'fake' one, apparently, was crushing him and being a general squealy fangirl.

'Obviously she does not remember what happened last night, as she isn't covered in Naruto's blood. Or dead,' Sasuke thought as he pushed the annoying girl off and stood up. The two soon left the room, to find Naruto and Kakashi in the kitchen. Sasuke looked to the remaining pancakes, picking one up and sniffing it. Sure enough, that odd scent was still there.

He then proceeded to dump the rest of the pancakes in the trash, or try to, as Naruto's illusions took over, causing Sasuke to grab the expired milk instead.

"Sasukun! How'd you like my pancakes?" Naruto asked. FG Sakura looked at the apparently female Naruto that would make many others lose control of their bladder. Naruto was completely unaffected. Sasuke growled.

"What, your drugged pancakes?" Naruto stopped and looked at Sasuke.

"Drugged? No, these ones are clean! The strange taste and scent is from a flower I grow called Senzu! (2) It is safe, really! It restores your heath and stamina!" Sasuke looked at Naruto harder. "Then why did I lose cautiousness and wake up in some sort of kinky bondage nightmare?" Naruto just looked at Sasuke with a look of complete innocence and simplicity.

"Genjutsu. You hypnotized me last night and tried to access illegal files. Not even Yamanaka-San went as deep as you did. That illusion was supposed to be your punishment."

Sasuke and Kakashi just sweat dropped, while Sakura attempted to berate Naruto for doing something to Sasuke. Naruto ignored all and put the last of the pancakes, as well as some eggs and other breakfast delights, on the table, since apparently Naruto invited Kakashi and Sakura to join them for breakfast.

It was delicious.

Afterwards, Kakashi told the group that they wouldn't be taking any missions for the next week, and that the Hokage would like some more tests to be done over said week.

The three shrugged, and Kakashi left. When Sakura asked what had happened the last couple days (as she became 'real' Sakura roughly an hour after Naruto and Sasuke returned), Sasuke said that Naruto and Sasuke had to live together to make sure neither did anything to screw up, because Naruto's sanity was at risk and Sasuke was trusted enough to keep an eye on her just so she could keep an eye on him.

After, Sakura had to leave, due to Tsunade doing a lesson on medical Ninjutsu. Naruto asked if she and maybe Sasuke could join in a later class. Sakura said maybe and left. Naruto then took out some of her clothing from one of the bags and started shredding them and stitching them back together. She then changed into her latest masterpiece.

Her new attire consisted of a red sleeveless thigh-length kimono opened enough to show some impressive cleavage, over top a fishnet top. Around her mid-section was a blue obi. She also had on fishnet biker shorts, a blue scarf, detached kimono sleeves that were tight enough to stay on, the sleeve pouches waving almost wing-like in the breeze, as well as red ribbons holding her now long hair in two pony tails, like her sexy jutsu form, and a pair of long ribbon-laced sandals.

After Naruto finished changing, the two left for training ground 7.

Naruto used the rest of the day to punish Sasuke.

At the hospital that evening, Tsunade healed all of Sasuke's minor injuries and knocked him out so he could get some rest.

Naruto then took him home and fell into bed with him.

This was going to be a long week.

 **Chapter 4 finished!**

 **Short chapter, I know, but whatever.**

 **Going back to the chap. 1 AN, I was reading the Gold Diggers comic and realized that's where I got some of the ideas for the Uzumaki reproduction (Lycanthropes don't miscarriage or have labor pain). Also, (1), read Monster Musume/Daily Life With a Monster Girl/whatever you call it and look for Miia as Kimimoto tries to leave the bed, among other times throughout the series. For (2), yes I got it from Dragon Ball. Just a flower instead of a bean. Deal with it.**

 **Please like, fav, and subscribe!**

 **(Shadow JAFF melds into the shadows)**


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